[SMG4]
On the first day of Christmas, the princess threw at me
A bowl of cooked Spaghetti!

[Luigi]
On the second day of Christmas, the princess threw at me
Two Teletubbies
[SMG4]
And a bowl of cooked Spaghetti!

[Princess Peach]
On the third day of Christmas, the princess threw at me
Three magic rocks!
[Luigi]
Two Teletubbies
[SMG4]
And a bowl of cooked Spaghetti!

[Mario]
On the fourth day of Christmas, the princess threw at me
Four pissed-off cops
[Princess Peach]
Three magic rocks!
[Luigi]
Two Teletubbies
[SMG4]
And a bowl of cooked Spaghetti-blah!
[Toad]
On the fifth day of Christmas, the princess thrеw at me
Five hours of Justin Biebеr!!!
[Mario]
Four pissed-off cops
[Princess Peach]
Three magic rocks!
[Luigi]
Two Teletubbies
[SMG4]
And a bowl of cooked Spaghetti-oh god...

[Wario]
On the sixth day of Christmas, the princess threw at me
Six pianos chomping
[Toad]
Five hours of Justin Bieber!!!
[Mario]
Four pissed-off cops
[Princess Peach]
Three magic rocks!
[Luigi]
Two Teletubbies
[SMG4]
And a bowl of cooked Spaghetti!
[Steve]
On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Seven sexy surprises
[Wario]
Six pianos chomping
[Toad]
Five hours of Justin Bieber!!!
[Mario]
Four pissed-off cops
[Princess Peach]
Three magic rocks!
[Luigi]
Two Teletubbies
[SMG4]
And a bowl of cooked Spaghetti-Aah! Jesus Christ!!!

[Narrator]
On the eighth day of Christmas, the princess threw at me
Eight retarded jokes
[Steve]
Seven sexy surprises
[Wario]
Six pianos chomping
[Toad]
Five hours of Justin Bieber!!!
[Mario]
Four pissed-off cops
[Princess Peach]
Three magic rocks!
[Luigi]
Two Teletubbies
[SMG4]
And a bowl of cooked Spaghetti!
[Bowser]
On the ninth day of Christmas, the princess threw at me
Nine Ass Rippings!
[Narrator]
Eight retarded jokes
[Steve]
Seven sexy surprises
[Wario]
Six pianos chomping
[Toad]
Five hours of Justin Bieber!!!
[Mario]
Four pissed-off cops
[Princess Peach]
Three magic rocks!
[Luigi]
Two Teletubbies
[SMG4]
And a bowl of cooked Spaghetti! (*falls over*)

[Old Man]
On the tenth gay of Christmas, the princess threw at me
Ten Pikachus!
[Bowser]
Nine Ass Rippings!
[Narrator]
Eight retarded jokes
[Steve]
Seven sexy surprises
[Wario]
Six pianos chomping
[Toad]
(*unintelligible gibberish*)
[Mario]
Four pissed-off cops
[Princess Peach]
Three magic rocks!
[Luigi]
Two Teletubbies
[SMG4]
And a bowl of big boobies!

[Waluigi]
On the eleventh day of Christmas, the princess threw at me
Eleven shirtless men. Heh heh
[Old Man]
Ten Pikachus!
[Bowser]
Nine Ass Rippings!
[Narrator]
Eight retarded jokes
[Steve]
Seven Santa's sexy underwears
[Wario]
Six pianos chomping
[Toad]
Five hours of Justin Bieber!!!
[Mario]
Four pissed-off cops
[Princess Peach]
Three magic rocks!
[Luigi]
Two Teletubbies
[SMG4]
And a bowl of cooked Spaghetti!

[Weegee]
Weegee weeg, Weegee Weegee, Weegee Weegee weeg
Weegee Weegee Weegee!
[Waluigi & Weegee]
(*exclaiming while fighting*)
[Old Man]
Where is my jewels?
[Bowser]
I came in like a wrecking ball!
[Narrator]
Yep, I'm done. What the hell is going on?
[Steve]
Seven s-Hi guys!
[Wario]
Oh my god!!!
[Toad]
I love you Mario!!!
[Mario]
Shut up!
[Princess Peach]
(*unintelligible gibberish*)
[Luigi]
Wha! Ooooohoohoohoo!!!
[Teletubbies]
Tubby Custard! Tubby Custard!
[SMG4]
Uh...

[All except Narrator, (Weegee)]
And a bowl of cooked Spaghetti!
(Weegee weegee weegeeeeeeee!! Weegee?)