[Verse 1]
Facebook is for asshats
Tumblr is full of morons
Twitter is full of idiots
The internet is dumb

Leafing through the pages
Of a guide to live
I’ve memorized the section
About the animal kingdom

[Chorus]
Why do birds
Why do birds
Why do birds lie to birds?
Why do birds lie to birds
But they always tell the truth
To every other animal?

Why do birds
Why do birds
Why do birds lie to birds?
Why do birds lie to birds
But they always tell the truth
To every other animal?
[Verse 2]
Birds are jerks
And dogs will pee on everything you own
Pigs are all insane

Ducks eat bread and only bread
And scorpions will sting you cuz
Their tails are made of pain

Why do birds
Why do birds
Why do birds suddenly appear
Every time I’m not here
Why do birds suddenly appear
In the walls in the attic in the halls
Bang their tiny heads
Against the window

[Chorus]
Why do birds
Why do birds
Why do birds lie to birds?
Why do birds lie to birds
But they always tell the truth
To every other animal?
[Verse 3]
Snakes are death tubes
Antelopes are only there for show
Goats will let you down

Birds, they can’t see glass
And rats will do laundry at your house
And they will turn your white clothes brown

Why do birds
Why do birds
Why do birds suddenly appear?
Every time I’m not here
Why do birds whisper in your ear?

[Verse 4]
Craigslist is for murderers
EBay is full of garbage
Never go on reddit cuz the internet is dumb

Sniffing through the engine
Of my rattling car
I don’t know what these things are
And I don’t know how to fix them

[Chorus]
Why do birds
Why do birds
Why do birds lie to birds?
Why do birds lie to birds
But they always tell the truth
To every other animal?
[Verse 5]
Wolves are great, they’ll make you lunch
While raccoons steal your credit card
And drive you to the bar
Bears will break into your house
And badly play your piano
While foxes fix your car

And kangaroos will help you with your resume
While coyotes pour you tea
And cats will let you play their synthesizers
Til the middle of the night
Geckos are annoying but they’re always on TV

[Outro]
Foxes will help you fix your car
Foxes will help you fix your car
Foxes will help you fix your car