[PIERRE]
There’s a war going on
Out there somewhere
And Andrey isn’t here
There’s a war going on
Out there somewhere
And Andrey isn’t here

[ALL]
There’s a war going on
Out there somewhere
And Andrey isn’t here
There’s a war going on
Out there somewhere
And Andrey isn’t here

And this is all in your program
You are at the opera
Gonna have to study up a little bit
If you wanna keep with the plot
'Cause it’s a complicated Russian novel
Everyone’s got nine different names
So look it up in your program
We’d appreciate it, thanks a lot
Da da da
Da da da
Da da da...
Natasha!

[NATASHA]
Natasha is young
She loves Andrey with all her heart

[ALL]
She loves Andrey with all her heart
Natasha is young
And Andrey isn’t here

[SONYA]
Sonya is good
Natasha’s cousin and closest friend

[ALL]
Natasha’s cousin and closest friend
Sonya is good
Natasha is young
And Andrey isn’t here

[MARYA]
Marya is old-school, a grande dame of Moscow
Natasha’s godmother, strict yet kind

[ALL]
Natasha’s godmother, strict yet kind
Marya is old-school
Sonya is good
Natasha is young
And Andrey isn’t here
And this is all in your program
You are at the opera
Gonna have to study up a little bit
If you wanna keep with the plot
'Cause it’s a complicated Russian novel
Everyone’s got nine different names
So look it up in your program
We’d appreciate it, thanks a lot
Da da da
Da da da
Da da da...

Anatole!

[ANATOLE]
Anatole is hot
He spends his money on women and wine

[ALL]
He spends his money on women and wine
Anatole is hot
Marya is old-school
Sonya is good
Natasha is young
And Andrey isn’t here
[HÉLÈNE]
Hélène is a slut
Anatole’s sister, married to Pierre

[ALL]
Anatole’s sister, married to Pierre
Hélène is a slut
Anatole is hot
Marya is old-school
Sonya is good
Natasha is young
And Andrey isn’t here

[DOLOKHOV]
Dolokhov is fierce, but not too important
Anatole’s friend, a crazy good shot

[ALL]
Anatole’s friend, a crazy good shot
Dolokhov is fierce
Hélène is a slut
Anatole is hot
Marya is old-school
Sonya is good
Natasha is young
And Andrey isn’t here

Chandeliers and caviar, the war can’t touch us here
Minor characters!

[BOLKONSKY]
Old Prince Bolkonsky is crazy

[MARY]
And Mary is plain

[MARY & BOLKONSKY]
Andrey’s family, totally messed up

[BALAGA]
And Balaga’s just for fun!

[ALL]
Balaga’s just for fun!
Balaga is fun
Bolkonsky is crazy
Mary is plain
Dolokhov is fierce
Hélène is a slut
Anatole is hot
Marya is old-school
Sonya is good
Natasha is young
And Andrey isn’t here

And what about Pierre?
Dear, bewildered and awkward Pierre?
What about Pierre?
Rich, unhappily married Pierre?
What about Pierre?
What about Pierre?
What about Pierre?