There's a party at my house every night
And there's always plenty of beer and wine
When it's turned up why would I go out?
This party is me all alone inside of my house

Facebook invitation to a great local show
I always say that I'm interested but I never go
Cause the party don't stop until the dishes are clean
And the Netflix doesn't stop until I fall asleep

I can't go out tonight I'm too tired
I can't go out tonight I'm too tired
I can't go out tonight I'm too tired
I can't go out tonight I'm too tired
Maybe I should just get fired

Do you wanna get drinks with me at 8?
I can't, I'm not feeling too great
Do you wanna watch wrestling with me?
I can't leave my dog this early
Do you wanna play Magic the Gathering?
I've got plans of doing nothing
Do you never do anything at all?

I can't go out tonight I'm too tired
I can't go out tonight I'm too tired
I can't go out tonight I'm too tired
I can't go out tonight I'm too tired

I can't go out tonight I'm too tired
I can't go out tonight I'm too tired
Can't go out, can't go out, can't go out
Can't go out, can't go out, can't go out

I can't go out I'm too lazy
I can't go out I'm too sad
YOU'RE FIRED!