I can't go to work

My mouth is wet, my throat is dry

I'm going blind in my right eye

My tonsils are as big as rocks

I've counted sixteen chicken pox



And there's one more - that's seventeen

And don't you think my face looks green?

My leg is cut, my eyes are blue

It might be the instamatic flu



I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke

I'm sure that my left leg is broke

My hip hurts when I move my chin

My belly button's caving in



My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained

My 'pendix pains each time it rains

My toes are cold, my toes are numb

I have a sliver in my thumb



My neck is stiff, my voice is weak

I hardly whisper when I speak

My tongue is filling up my mouth

I think my hair is falling out



My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight

My temperature is one-o-eight

My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear

There's a hole inside my ear



I have a hangnail, and my heart is ...

What? What's that? What's that you say?

You say today is .............. Saturday?

Good bye, I'm going out to play!”