(Verse)
It happened down at the Golden Gate
A fool there was, and her name was Kate
She went and found herself a mate
And she suffered ever after
Of millionaires she had her pick
But she played herself a dirty trick
When she chose that guy whose name is Slick
She's a sap to love him so
Listen to her tale of woe

(Chorus)
I fetch him slippers
Fill up the pipe he smokes
I cook the kippers
Laugh at his oldest jokes
Yet here I anchor
I might have had a banker
Boy! What love has done to me!

His nature's funny
Quarrelsome half the time
And as for money
He hasn't got a dime
And here's the joker
I might have had a broker
Boy! What love has done to me!
When a guy looks my way
Does he get emphatic?
Say he gets dramatic
I just want to fly away
But if I left him I'd be all at sea

I'm just a slavey
Life is a funny thing
He's got the gravy
I got a wedding ring
And still I love him
There's nobody above him
Boy! What love has done to me!

(scat break)

(Chorus 2)
His brains are minus
Never a thought in sight
And yet His Highness
Lectures me day and night
Oh, where was my sense
To sign that wedding license?
Boy! What love has done to me!

My life he's wrecking
Bet you could find him now
Out somewhere necking
Somebody else's Frau
You get to know life
When married to a lowlife
Boy! What love has done to me!
I can't keep my head up
The butcher, the baker
All know he's a faker
Brother, I am fed up
But I left him he'd be up a tree

Where will I wind up
I don't know where I'm at
I make my mind up
I oughta leave him flat
Yet I have grown so
I love the dirty so-and-so
Boy! What love has done to me!