Victoria Wood
Fourteen Again
I want to be fourteen again
When sex was just called number ten
And I was up to seven and a half
Boys were for love, girls were for fun
You burst out laughing if you saw a nun
Sophistication was a sports car and a chiffon scarf
I want to be fourteen again
Tattoo my self with a fountain pen

Pretend to like the taste of rum and Coke
Chuck my school hat in a bush
Spit on my mascara brush
Buy Consulate and teach myself to smoke
I want to be fourteen again
Free rides on the waltzer off the fairground men

For a promise of a snog the last night of the fair—
French kissing as the kiosks shut
Behind the generators with your coconut
The coloured lights reflected in the Brylcream on his hair
I want to be fourteen again
For all the things I didn't know then

When I was funny, I was famous, I was never ignored
I was a crazy girl, I had to laugh
I had Ilya Kuriakin's autograph
I had no idea you could wake up feeling bored