[Verse 1]
A fine romance, with no kisses
A fine romance, my friend, this is
We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes
But you're as cold as yesterday's mashed potatoes
A fine romance, you won't nestle
A fine romance, you won't even wrestle
I might as well play bridge with my old maid aunt
I haven't got a chance
This is a fine romance

[Verse 2]
A fine romance, with no kisses
A fine romance, my friend, this is
We two should be like clams in a dish of chowder
But we just fizz like parts of a settler's powder
A fine romance, with no clinches
A fine romance, with no pinches
You're just as hard to land as the Île de France
I haven't got a chance
This is a fine romance