Stephen Lynch
D&D
Harmonica
More harmonica

[Verse 1]
I got my 12-sided die and I'm ready to roll with a wizard and my goblin crew
My friends are coming over to my mom's basement bringing Funyuns and the Mountain Dew
I got a big broadsword made outta cardboard, and that stereo's a-pumping Zeppelin
Dazed and Confused
It's that time of the night we turn on the black light
Let the Dungeons and the Dragons begin
It’s D&D
Fighting' with the legends of yore
It’s D&D
Never kissed a lady before
Nope, I said it
Whoo!

[Skit 1]
C’mon
You gonna bring the thunder
Bring the fucking thunder
C’mon bring the thunder c’mon lets go
*guitar pluck*
Oh that’s nice
Why don’t you bring some thunder mother fucker
I’ll bring some thunder alright
*rattle*
[Verse 2]
Now the Lord of the Rings, the Dark Crystal and things, we use these as a reference tool
And when we put on our cloaks and tell warlock jokes, we’re the coolest kids in the school
No we're not
I know
Now Teich's a real bastard, but a fair dungeon master, he's got hit points and charisma to land
And I rehearse in my room, or what I call the dragon's tomb, when I'm not out with my girl friend
It’s D&D

[Skit 2]
Wait wait wait wait wait Teich, hold on, I'm sorry, hold on, I’m sorry, gimme one second
Dude, come on
What
Seriously
What
You got a fucking girlfriend
"Dungeon Master"
Uhh… That’s kind of a dick thing to say

[Chorus]
It’s D&D
Summoning the demons of hell
It’s D&D
When our shift ends at the Taco Bell
Gordita, Chalupa
[Verse 3]
Well my medieval brother, there's room here for another
Would you care to take a roll of the die
You guys make me weep you think that you could keep up with a warrior as mighty as I
See you’re in mortal danger I’m a first class ranger whose half gargoyle and half elf
And if that doesn't scare you maybe I should be ware you of what lurks within my gaming shelf
Next to my junior high annual lies my monster manual and my customized dungeon masters screen
I've got treasures and traps on my graph paper maps next to my three inch solid pewter figurines
So if you think you've got the balls bring on your dungeon master calls I’ll be protected by my robe of destruction
I will leave you both in tears because I’m the dungeon master here and you two are in need of some instruction

[Outro]
It's D&D
Warriors who terrify
It's D&D
Virgins till the day weeeeeeeee…
Oh, oh, oh, oh
No, No, No, No, No
1, 2, Fuck You
Dieeeee