Bo Burnham
A Love Ballad
[Spoken Intro]
Hello, people of the world
And- and internet pedophiles
Uhm, I'm Bo Burnham, uh
I've changed since we've last met
I have some- I have some boy-ish acne, which is awesome
Uhm, and despite the shirt, I am- I am not gay
And to prove that, I will sing a love ballad
Here we go

[Chorus]
She got me with her looks, she got me with her stare
Bright blue eyes and her long blonde hair
From the start it was еasy to see
This was the girl for me
Who cares if shе was eighty-three?

[Verse 1]
She could make me silent, she could make me shout
And she drove me wild with those dentures out
When we ate, people said we were rude
'Cause I had to pre-chew her food

[Verse 2]
Her skin was saggy from her feet to her face
I put my hand up her skirt... Second base!
We made love, and the more I thrust
The more the room was covered in dust
*Cough*, the room was covered in dust
[Bridge]
Then one day I felt a chill
As I woke up from our bed
She was lying there real still
My little lady was already dead
The wake happened on a Saturday night
I just sat there and bowed my head
A little girl was on my right
Crying because her grandma was dead
And that little girl

[Chorus]
She got me with her looks, she got me with her tears
Feminine beauty beyond her years
From the start it was easy to see
That was the girl for me
Who cares if she was only three?