-AUUUGH-
Oh god, what am I gonna do when ti- tool time gets cancelled?
I think wilson is gonna kill me...
My son brad is a huge douchebag
I think Jill is having an affair (I saw her sucking wilson's dick)
-AUUUGH- -laughter-

Randy won't stop watching VR porn
Why am I attracted to Al Borland, is it his flannel shirts?
-AAAUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHH-

I only buy all these tools because I can't satisfy my wife
I think brad (MARK, I MEANT MARK) is having sex with her
That's ok, that's ok, I'm a modern father. I can do it. (aw oh oh)
I start, uh, I'm ,s uh, snorting cocaine again
(SSSSSMOKIN) (MY ASS)

I can't stop all these (MY ASS) noises in my head
-AAUUGH- -AUUGH- -AAAAUHG-
Make it end

My modern american family is falling apart
(ROLLING AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND, PLACES TO GO GOTTA FOLLOW MY RAINBOW)
I hear some dope shit been popping off at the club, but I can never attend due to my whore wife
-AH!-
Heidi is one hot piece of ass
But I can't seem to get it up any more
OH GOD, this song has gone horribly wrong. What do I do

(SSMOKIN)
Ok, get off the ri-, just get off the ride. Fuck