Heed my warning
The territory you're about to enter
Is not a pretty one
I can almost guarantee
That
Your ears will not enjoy this
But, if you're feeling adventurous, go for it
Don't say I didn't warn you

(Backwards gibberish)
January! 22nd!
(2017)
5:30! PM!

(Max Hiney: That almost sounded good for a second)

One, two, one, two, three, four

Don't waste the funk on a nasty dunk
Don't waste the funk on a nasty dunk
Don't waste the funk on a nasty dunk
Don't waste the funk on a nasty dunk

Basketballs dunked
Points scored
Records broken
Mascots ignored

(Backwards gibberish)
Satisfactory
Butter fingers sweaty

Lebron James!
Micheal Jackson!
Kobe Bryant?
Frank Pizza!
These are all the names of fantastic dunkers
That have lived throughout history

What may happen if we miss a dunk?
Our whole lives lost at a funk
Forgotten shells of our previous greatness
On the bench, forever taking a rest

So I promise to you coach
I will never miss a dunk
I will never fake the funk