CollegeHumor
Gift Shop
Hey Macklemore, can we go gift shopping?

What (x 16)
Hey look, what is that by the exit (x 4)

I'm gonna buy some crap
I've got money burning in my pocket
I - I'm a tourist at a museum
Look at all these gemstones

Nah, walk in the museum like 'What up, I need a pet rock'
Forget exhibits, I need something from the gift shop
Snack in a pouch looks so damn tasty
Clerk is like, 'Dude, that's astronaut ice-cream'

Trying on XL tees, playing with a light machine
Look for key chains, hope they have my name, it's Eugene
Wish I could buy all of it, slow globes, rain sticks
Probably check the weather cause it sounds so precipitous...

But shit, it costs more than my rent! (Uh)
Messin' it, pressin' it, these pins capture my expressions n'
Throwing all those bouncy balls bouncing below the bargain bin
This bird keeps on hydrating, it is drinking and bobbing; I am
Spending all my money on some desk toys that use physics bitch
I'mma buy a Newton's cradle, I'mma buy a Newton's cradle
No for real - ask the lady - do you carry pendulums?
Sci-fi noise tube, dinosaur stickers
Tornado-in-a-bottle that I found spinning

They had a tiny broadsword, I bought a tiny broadsword
Bought a fossil trinket, and then a finger skateboard
Hello, hello, candy-filled cell phone
Magnets top to bottom on my fridge door, YOLO

Walk up to the bin, scoop up a bag of gemstones
The geode heads would be like, 'Aw, he got the Fools' Gold'

I'm gonna get some snacks
And a 'Big Kid's Guide to Pirates'
I - I'm a tourist, at a museum
I should buy a telescope

What you know about rocking hats like Dave Crockett's
What you know about scale-replica muskets
I'm digging, I'm digging, I'm searching for the right puzzle
Jigsaw art of a NASA Space Shuttle

Buy your step-dad a Uranus mouse-pad and a
Sweat-shirt, plus a pot of seeds and some dirt
I'm at the check-out, you can find me by the (koosh balls)
I got, I got yelled at by the guy for throwing (koosh balls)
For grammy, for aunty, for momma, for daddy
I'll take some mugs for all my family, birthday gifts, I own that motherfucker
A mammoth model with the bones in that motherfucker
I got a beetle trapped in stone like a motherfucker

They be like, 'Oh, that jewelery - that's hella tight'
I'm like, 'Yo - it was made by local artisans'
Limited edition craft by Indian tradition
Fifty dollars for a pendant it supports the reserva-(tions)

I bought that and this cool floaty pen (shit)
I bought that and this Young Scientist (Kit)
That kit's hella dope
But mixing acids without goggles or some gloves or supervision is a hella don't

Peep game, come take a look through my kaleidoscope
Tring to find gifts that are bland? Man you hella won't
Man you hella won't

Gift Shops
Hoberman Spheres
Yeah

I wear a shirt with wolves
And in the dark it glows
All of this and more that's dope
In that Gift Shop by the door