I wanna say your a real good guy
But we don't know that would be a lie
Its a nightmare being your friend
So its to for this charade to end

I can't say... goodbye

Cause you might grin me down to meat pie
I'll tell the school you have avian flu
So it'll be their job to get rid of you
I hope they put you into quarantine
Or lock you up until you turn eighteen
So maybe then, i'll never have to fear
That you might suddenly bite of my ear
Please dont bite of my ear

I can't say..goodbye

My face will be too mangled to identify
If I could get your house repossessed
You'll be forced to relocate to your gran's in the Northwest

I could get you arrested for stealing a car
I could get you a job as a miner
I could ship you in a crate to Qatar
Or sell you as kebab to a dirty diner
It's not real meat, anyway
I could get your folks to forget you on the freeway
Sell you to a freak show on its way to Uruguay
I could get you stuck on a fairground ride, forever
Send you to a wedding in Somewhere-stan with you as the bride

I can't say..goodbye

But it's no use trying to deny
That I don't wanna be friends with you
So do whatever you have to do