[Verse: Bob the Drag Queen]
T'was the night before Christmas, and all through the world
Such butch men are becoming such glamorous girls
Fake nails and wigs fill up Santa's sleigh
And he flies through the night on his reindeer, okayyyy?
His rosy cheeks and his Wigs & Grace hair
Paired with his ample hips and his padded derriere
Crushed red velvet suit and a patent leather shoe
Turns out, Santa Claus is a drag queen too!
Mrs. Claus, his Good Judy, and the elves, they're all twinks
So Santa really SLAYS, don't you think?
He duck walks down your chimney and SHABLAM's in the snow
Whips his hair in the wind, because he's sickening, no?
So if on your roof you hear a click-clack sound
Or you wake to find a fake fingernail on the ground
Don't let that scare you or give you pause
Cause honey, you've just been visited by Ms. Sandra Claus!