Turn on the TV
Turn on the radio
Turn down that sound
Turn down that sound

Open the curtains
Open the windows
What's happening around
What's happening around

I'll do some washing
I might go shopping
I'm going downtown
I'm going downtown

Someone told me, "Nothing happened today"

I woke up late
I had a headache
I went back to sleep
Go back to sleep

I stood there waiting
Waiting for something
There wasn't a thing
Not even one thing
Someone told me, "nothing happened today."

Harry Hooper living in No. 10
Bought a toupee and glued it to his head
"It looks very natural," everybody said
But then his wife said "Toupee, isn't that a French word?"
And Harry said, "Ole." She said, "That's a Spanish word."
And he said "O.K., can't tell the difference these days."

I watched TV
Cos I wanted to see
The late news at 10
It came on and then

She shuffled her papers
She swivelled in her chair
She looked up and said

The weather was fair
And then it turned cold
It started to rain
Pouring with rain

Some people died
Some people were born
And some stayed the same
And some went insane
Tomorrow's Wednesday
Today was Tuesday
And this is the date
March 28th

It was the morning
Then afternoon
And then the night came
And then the night came

Oh...and someone told me, "Nothing happened today."
Yes, someone told me, "Nothing happened today."
It happened today