156/Silence
By a Thread (I Suspend)
Fuck what you seem to recall. Go back to sleep
Ill intentions call me by my first name

Honesty’s deported, everything’s unsorted. I can’t pretend anything’s on course. I fail myself
Looking back I forced this on myself. Remorse is all that I have kept despite the corpses in my mind
I just suspend

Still withering in this ruin
I forgot to mention that I’ve lost all interest in rebuilding peace
All false idols never know the cost of what you do. You’ll always just be full of fucking shit
By a thread, I’m still suspending up
I just wonder, am I moving on?

Still, I’m suspending on the chord I should have cut before with all of my defiling traits I showed to all of the world
Wishing I could curse this off one someone worse
I wonder if I’ll end up as the first to parish all for nothing but this
I’m crippled with this sense of regret

Time after time, I just can’t fucking stress enough that the blood in me boiled
I fought it off, following nothing. I felt the cut
Don’t you fucking forget it you cunt

Gasping for air but it won’t fill my fucking lungs
Still I won’t beg for abetment. Failing to learn, failing to express myself
You just watch off in the background