Joe Iconis
The Squip Enters
[JEREMY, spoken]
AAA-OH!!

[VOICE, spoken]
Target female inaccessible

[CHRISTINE, spoken]
Jeremy?

[JEREMY, spoken]
Oh, what the Hell?!

[VOICE, spoken]
Calibration in process. Please excuse some mild discomfort

[JEREMY, spoken]
Mild?

[CHRISTINE, spoken]
Jeremy, what's wrong?

[JAKE, spoken]
Dude, that freak is freaking out!

[VOICE, spoken]
Calibration complete. Access procedure initiated
[JEREMY, spoken]
Oh, wait, I'm fine. I just-

[VOICE, spoken]
Discomfort level may increase

[JEREMY, spoken]
AGH!!!

[VOICE, spoken]
Accessing neural memory
Accessing muscle memory
Access procedure complete
Jeremy Heere, welcome to your Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor
Your SQUIP

[JEREMY, spoken]
You look like Keanu Reeves

[SQUIP, spoken]
My default mode. But I can see you may prefer to take instructions from Batman, Beyonce, a sexy anime cat girl with a tail-

[JEREMY, spoken]
Uh, Keanu's fine. Can everyone see you?

[SQUIP, spoken]
I exist only in your mind. All they see is you having an animated conversation with yourself. So, don't do that. Just think at me, like you're telepathic
[JEREMY, spoken]
Like in X-Men?

[SQUIP, spoken]
I can see this is going to be difficult. You wanna be more chill

[JEREMY, spoken]
Oh, you mean cool!

[SQUIP, spoken]
I do not!