I am living in a state of disarray
Conflicted with the thought of my grave(where it will lay)
My time is short so I'm making this clear
I don't think I can live if I'm all that matters here

And I'm making the same mistakes that I've always made
Faithless in all my ways, stuck in a cycle of selfish hate

I used to hold my head up high and walk with purpose in the world
A boy of wonder, life, and courage; a reason to carry on

Make no mistake, I'll be okay
I've hit the bottom of the barrel before
I'm scared to leave my bed for fear of everything but sleep
Cherishing nothing but the apathy I forced down my throat 'cause I can't bare being sober

If my life is for someone else, what am I doing here?
I keep staring at the sky only knowing I'll disappear

God, let me fall away into a better place
Only you know the bed I've made
Am I too gone for repair?
I breathe in failure like it's my final source of air

How can I struggle with faith if I have none?
I relate to nothing but the dirt that I lay upon
Tucked beneath the soles of shoes, I'm scrubbed away then forgotten and sold for another's use

If my life is for someone else, what am I doing here?
I keep staring at the sky only knowing I'll disappear

We traded morals for money and dignity for attention
So set on a negative mindset that we forgot the feeling
The conversations I held were meaningless
The time I lived for nothing was time I wasted

Even if you're best acquainted with the traits you see as imperfect, I know you well enough to know you'll always be worth it

We spent far too much time just sitting, wallowing in the rain
Looking in mirrors everyday just to hate the face that looks back at us
That feeling is a poison and it travels through your veins
Swimming into your everyday, making a home where it doesn't belong
Fear and hatred are uncharted territory; yourself and the unknown can be the scariest place to get lost in
I lost it when I saw you burying yourself alive with pills that we're not prescription
Script a new scene where your vices are not the leading role
We're all made of defects but we have stories to be told
Without one the other is not quite as beautiful and beauty is in my eyes the best thing to behold
Care not of a person's past and things it entailed: Illness, addiction, abuse, and judgement; in your head or from someone you loved
You are more than anyone could've ever imagined and we have imagined it all
Whether you believe in nothing, yourself, the devil, or God, there is always a reason to carry on