[Chorus]
Liquor and whores
Liquor and whores
Cigarettes and dope and mustard and baloney
Liquor and whores

[Verse 1]
I went down
Drinkin' at the Legion
I met a girl she was nice
She was pretty and pleasing
She said "Hey boy
We should do some marrying"
I said sure but before we do
There's something that you should know
I like

[Chorus]
Liquor and whores
Liquor and whores
Cigarettes and dope and mustard and baloney
Liquor and whores

[Verse 2]
Then one night down at the legion
She walked in, I was drunk on gin
Dancin with a lady friend
She said "hey boy
You better fly the fuck home"
I said no cause five little words I coulda
Swore I said to you
I like

[Chorus]
Liquor and whores
Liquor and whores
Cigarettes and dope and mustard and baloney
Liquor and whores
(2x)