I have a shop
It is a sausage shop
And I sell sausages by the sausage
In my sausage shop

You need a sausage?
I have the sausage for you
Just come and ding-dong on my sausage shop
And I'll find the perfect banger for you

I have pork and garlic sausage
I have pork and apple sausage
I have sausage with pork & herbs
And I also have chili
(It's a spicy porky willy)

I have chicken sausage
And turkey sausage
I have lamb and beef
And so many sausages

Yes I love a good sausage
And I know you do
So step into my sausage boudoir
And I'll find the perfect banger for you
There are so many wonderful, magical
Marvelous, fantastical, fa-lastical
Terrible things you can do with a sausage

You can do with a sausage
You can do with a sausage
You can do with a sausage

And I promise you honestly the meat
Inside my sausage is fresh as fresh can be
(No bones)
I guarantee that my slippery tubes of meat
Will make you smile

Imagine a life with no sausage
What a dystopia it would be
To not have the feeling of holding
A ripe piggy finger in my hand
I just can not imagine it

The warmth in my heart
When I'm grinding the meat
And I'm adding ingredients
You cannot beat

The sensation of banger creation
My wee-willy-winkies
I can't bear to think-y
My babies, My lovers
Just kidding
My sweety frank furters
I won't ever hurt ya
I promise you Mummy
Will stay by your side
To cradle and promenade
My meat-creations, my pride

I'm declaring this now
To both man & bird
I will spread my sausage
All over the world
I'll bring joy & peace
To all in this land, we will walk
As one, with sausage in hand

So don't you deny me this
My one true love, the gift
From the Sausage Gods
High up above

My little Miss Piggies
In their little skin sackies
Are the only thing that
Make me truly happy

(...Sit down.)
So come on down to my shop
(Come on down to her shop)
It is a sausage shop
(It's still a sausage shop)
We have the scrummiest, yummiest tasties
In my sausage shop
(Sorry if this was gargantuan waste of everyone's time)

So come down & be awed at my sausage
(People of the world, get out your sausage)
Vive la Révolution!
(Vive la Sausage)

I have never felt the love of a human

It's my sausage shop!

This next song we used to sing when we lived in Canada
And we’d get quite homesick. We decided to write this
Song that we could sing when we felt homesick. So we
Wrote it in the style of an Old English folk song to
Remind us of the good old days in England