Dear Little Flo & Little Joan
There are some things you need to know
But don't be scared, we're here to tell you
What they are while you are still Little Flo & Little Joan
So settle down & here we go, put down your Quavers
We're gonna want to make some notes

Dear Little Flo
You're going to stay a little Flo
Which will make dating hard cause men will think
You're planted by police to catch the pеrverts
But it's fine, Little Flo, you'vе got so many years to grow
And one day you will keep a bunch of
Men trapped in your basement

Dear Little Joan
You need to know that you will never find
A pair of jeans that fits you well. But it's ok
Please do not cry, Little Joan, for when you arms
And legs are grown, you'll realize jeans aren't that important
And you can always wear flares

You'll try to hard at some stuff
And not hard enough at others
But who needs French A Level, anyway?
E ne sais pas danse la sac
Au sacreblue mon meilleur
And I mean that from the heart
Don't hang out with the cool kids
Find a corner with the weirdos
And read lots of books
Stretch your imagination
Ask tons of questions and

Stop throwing tantrums
No one likes a person who
Throws lots of tantrums
We're looking at you, Little Joan

Let Little Flo borrow your clothes
Cause one day she will own cool jumpers
That you'll want to wear and
You'll steal them from her wardrobe

And you'll spill little stains on her little clothes
And tell little lies to cover up those little stains
And I will know, She will know

Keep saying please and thank you
And you're welcome
And tell people that you love them
Fight for stuff, Say no to things that you don't want

And keeping being a nice person
Lots of people are nice persons
You get back from the world what you give out
And that includes your farts
Dear Little Flo & Little Joan
Welcome strangers to your home
Try everything you can
Like booze & hair mascara

Please don't cry when you read magazines
And stop searching for perfection
It can really get you down
But perfect people are boring

And cake is fucking great
So eat it all and make mistakes
Enjoy the body that you're in
Cause after all you are alive
And some people are not

Look after Little Flo when she is angry
Look after Little Joan when she is hungry
Stick together, please stop eating Peperamis

Sometimes you'll feel very small & helpless
Like nothing you do matters
But the smallest things can matter

Make your own choices
Never stop doing things
That make you truly happy
Fight for yourself
And fight for others

Show up to your life
And love it

And then when all else fails
You can solve anything with tea
And a sausage

Dear Little Flo & Little Joan
We've told you lots of stuff we know
And it will take a year or two to let it sink it
It's ok, Little Flo & Little Joan
You've got so many years to grow

And remember one last thing...
Watch out for stairs

Good Luck
Love Big Joan
& Little Flo