El-P
Train Buffer
[Hook]
Who stole the uprock, who stole the paint?
Who stole the cypher slayers, who buffed the train?
Who stole the mixtapes, who stole the fame?
Who stole the cypher slayers, who buffed the train?

[Verse 1]
Barnacle on the hull of show business
Vote for auto dead horse battery
Murder perfect world Gerber Baby ecosystem
Army green eyes with ColecoVision bash casually
While punks jump up and jeopardize my head banger reality (ah)
Godzilla jook
Red five minus the whiny Wookiee
Gobble gromits with a jaw that swivels backwards off the hinges
Mollasses [?] on plastic fabric with a cause
That riddles bastard coughs with ribbons
Nerve-wracker that pivots
As a dysfunctional dancer in the dark
My smart bomb mechanism ticks adjacent to the broke city
Art yester-vision
I'm mister God Bless the Mission who rose to expose your tarot
And stop the ball club kids on ?stoner?
(How about a little fire scarecrow)
But brainiac dumb-dumb, bust the duck hunter
I let the fuckin' dogs out and they're breeding in big numbers
It sorta' irks citizen exes and vexes check collectors
Hexed by the flex of a messy pegasus
Remarkable but unmarketable
Leg'go my treasure chest
It's empty, but I use it to cradle my true confessions list
Confession one:
Aesop was raised to the Colonel Kurtz daycare center
For disgruntled youths where it's brilliant to flee the sheep flock
You're a little teapot homie please don't feed the pigeons
They're tryin' to spread their peacock feathers
And bleed through the system
This goes out to plainclothes prophets
Free for the wisdom
Who swore they'd never spend a night and sleep in the pigpen
Touch the prickly outer shell of reptilian
Minimal nighttime Z-catcher
20,000 league mapper, and um
Me and my primitive friends drag our knuckles
And find your upright bipedal walking ugly
(I'll be in the back evolving from a monkey)
Thanks to y'all that came to school with paint stains on your fingertips
And brought a little life to those Long Island railroad city trips
Please, remember I can build you my friend
And if I'm not happy, I'll break you the fuck down and build you again
[Hook]
Who stole the uprock, who stole the paint?
Who stole the cypher slayers, who buffed the train?
Who stole the mixtapes, who stole the fame?
Who stole the cypher slayers, who buffed the train?

[Verse 2]
I drag my alligator belly to the brake light (Hi)
And drag my alligator belly back to bed until I die
You've got a metal skull with wires through your heart and a dead air surplus
(Ludicrous)
Like Labor Days bootleggers on some support the movement shit
My practice: life inside a pitch black magic pack of rat brackets
That's tragic
?Bout to head back? to out for a pack of rat bastards
That's an earthworm mentality, flag captured
Peaceful: telling me that ?Aes speaks? proudly
On a soulful with an idle motor
They say decrepit
Is where I'm at
Sinful like a brain full of bottle rockets
Not a model, not a prophet (nope) not ?undone?
Got a fuckload of missions here want 'em
You can tell your man they came to you in a daydream
And I won't rally back, alley cat (Passion)
One tall glass (action)
Taller glass for the (aspirin)
Balderdash (backspin)
Back track, back in effect, back in the clutch
Sittin' on this old '98 BFA collecting dust
Slack-jawed, smiling like a hacksaw, that's raw
Spit master conspirator feeder for critics to suck
You're off track betting on a one-trick pony
With pony express delivery delay effect, funny
No, that's not funny
City yard slaughtered ugly
With pins needles and duck-walks busted
Sitting at the movies with a large bucket of Xanax
Extra butter and a spring water
Kamikaze Zaxxons
Flight simulator major
Street pilot directly through the iris
Fuck it, freak the fader on some fly shit
[Hook]
Who stole the uprock, who stole the paint?
Who stole the cypher slayers, who buffed the train?
Who stole the mixtapes, who stole the fame?
Who stole the cypher slayers, who buffed the train?

[Hook]
Who stole the uprock, who stole the paint?
Who stole the cypher slayers, who buffed the train?
Who stole the mixtapes, who stole the fame?
Who stole the cypher slayers, who buffed the train?

[Outro]
This for the prostitute I almost called last night
But didn't
Thank you
I don't need any diseases right now
Even if it gives me pleasure for uh, 20 minutes
El-P, where the fuck you at?
Yo El, call, call that escort service
Tell her the address
That's it
Motherfucker
Motherflocker
Make it an Asian one
The worlds gonna end anyway
No make it Spanish, definitely Spanish
No make it German
No make it Latin
Fuck it
If she's got two tits and a vagina I'll fuck it
It doesn't even have to have two legs at this point
I don't need legs or arms
If she treats me nicely for an hour
It's all good
My mom would be proud
Look what you raised mom
Are you proud of me?
I'm a rapper
I make good songs, people like me
I can even get hookers to fuck me
Mom I need 200 dollars
And uh, don't call me tomorrow night between ten and eleven