[Intro, spoken]
ThiefofBaghdad
Wishes to advise
That the following is a paid presentation

[Hook]
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Actin' like life is a big commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Actin' like life is a big commercial

[Verse 1]
Introducing the uncoordinated Bruce Lee-
Jarv, retard on tracks by ThiefofBaghdad from New Zea-
Landing on branches like Leo in The Revenant
While rappers get branded I stay contractually hesitant
Standing on my own two
Dismantle a pansy- thrown through
Paneling of fake wood
I'm hotter than rockin' snowsuits
In July or August
Gotta' teach 'em- taught 'em raw shit
Temperature will be goin' up
Hotter than any dumb hoe with some large tits
Grab 'em, ahh
Motorboat *brrrr* slap 'em
Not the tits the rappers braggin' about their massive lack of talent
Riding on a hoverboard
Elastic ankle slouch pants
Smedium shirts and snapbacks
Doin' the dab dance
How much were the shoes that your parents bought you?
Haven't worked a day in your life it's so ironic you're a tool
Man, who you trying to impress?
Have you not a shred of virtue?
Actin' like life is a big commercial
Yeah I ain't buyin' it

[Hook]
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Actin' like life is a big commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Actin' like life is a big commercial

[Verse 2]
Act now and we'll throw in an extra set for free
Call the number on your screen and buy my shitty CD
Grab your fire suits because this mixtape's fuego
Act now and you'll receive a stale everything bagel
Taste-testers open up your mouths real wide
We've got a little something that we wanna put inside
It's great for all occasions
Especially college parties
Best enjoyed while you're chompin' off your tongue rollin' on Molly
Get your glow sticks ready
Autotune comin' at ya'
Baalooaaloooaalooaalooo
Who's your new favorite rapper?
Give me all your money
Invest in my clothing line
Fashion over rapping
In my skirt I'm feeling so divine
I made it
Thanks to all of the kids who donated
I'm poppin' bottles
Sippin' syrup
Gettin' so faded
I'm famous
Most played on your little sister's playlist
My listeners are dumb and they're easily persuaded
Man, fuck that
You suck and you're only getting worse, dude
Thief and I will break down walls
Bomb and then burst through
Bother and hurt
Vomit and purge on your purse, dude
You're actin' like life is a big commercial
Suck my balls
Fuckin idiots

[Hook]
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial
Actin' like life is a big commercial
Actin' like life is a big commercial
Actin' like life is a big commercial
Actin' like life is a big commercial
Actin' like life is a big commercial

[Outro, spoken]
Imagine a psychic force so powerful that it shapes the lives of over 100 million people around the world every day
There is such a power
And you can tap into it
Just like presidents
Celebrities
World and religious leaders
And the countless others who have discovered the magical inspiration of a man who's gifts are changing the world
His name is
ThiefofBaghdad