I've been this close to
f*cking killing myself
Everyone wonders if
I really need help
And even then, why?
Man you got it all they say
Melt myself, like it'll heal somethin
Havin a mental break down
Every other night
I don't wanna die
Just sometimes I wish
I was never given existence
So let me wallow away in this filth
I gave it all up for this?
It's one fifth in the afternoon
I'm losing my soul way too soon
Feels like every bad thing
I've ever said about myself
Was really my way of
Projecting on my view of my father
Man why do I think I need help?
Why do I think I'm some thing else?
Why the f*ck do I think this way?
Why the f*ck do i think I'm insane?
My brain feels like it has holes in it
I'm so f*cking stupid
Memories getting worse
What's gonna happen when I forget my mom?
Like, Who the f*ck am I?
If, then, because
This is what getting old does
Feel like I need a buzz
Something to take the nerve off
And all cus of this motherf*cking....