[Verse 1]
Lady, I have been told that you only date nice guys
Well, if that's how you judge a lover's worth
Your ass just hit pay dirt
I'm the most sensitive man on God's green Earth
Here's a rose bouquet
I also baked you some fresh creme brûlée
Now mount this stallion and we shall ride
While also flying kites
Make love inside a rainbow through the night

[Chorus]
Then after sex, I'll cry, cry
And also, before sex, I'll cry, cry

[Interlude]
Girl, you know how I feel about you
It's like you're a fossil sample
And I'm an impatient paleontologist
Cause I want to date you badly

[Verse 2]
Watch a film with me
I love boring romantic comedies
Hop in my carriage, this is like your dream
Any movie we see can be a drive-in movie
If we build up enough speed
Now it's almost dawn
I can communicate with newborn fawns
Now they'll perform an ancient forest dance
That will melt off your pants
Take my junk by the hand, this is romance
[Chorus]
And during sex, I'll cry
Thinking about sex makes me cry
Even when I use a sextant, I cry
They measure angles (Cry)

[Outro]
Sorry, was that too sensitive for you?
Don't worry about me, I'll be fine
I'll just be over here, thinking about a duckling
Riding on the back of a puppy
Also the duckling is wearing a tiny cowboy hat
Slightly tilted