[Verse 1]
Deep in the suburbs of New Jersey
In the basement of the Sexbang house
You are the hero with the heart of a god
Yet you're barely the size of a mouse

[Pre-Chorus]
You can see the nightly news on TV
As you race on the wheel of your cage
Watching as society all goes to shit
Your tiny body filling with rage

[Chorus]
Galaxy Hamster! Galaxy Hamster!
Your training is almost complete
Galaxy Hamster! Galaxy Hamster!
Now unleash your powerful scream

*squeak*

[Verse 2]
Ever since the battle of Gerbulon V
The galaxy was ripped in twain
The rodents of the Northern Alliance were called
To defend those who had not been slain
[Pre-Chorus]
The fates of the goldfish and snakes had aligned
United by a common foe
To banish the hamster king from his command
But one hero could save the throne

Only the dead have seen the end of war!

[Chorus]
Galaxy Hamster! Galaxy Hamster!
A savior of all those who squeak
Galaxy Hamster! Galaxy Hamster!
You store all your wrath in your cheeks

[Interlude]
Galaxy Hamster! Galaxy Hamster!

[Spoken]
Avi: Dan, are you playing with your small pets?
Danny: No dad! Don't come in my room!
GH: *choking sound*
Danny: ...Galaxy Hamster?

[Emotional Ending]
Sweet hamster, you have saved the galaxy
Fill your cheeks with sunflower seeds of victory
You did not stop 'til your mission was through
You just died of natural causes at the old age of two
Ride on the wings of a rainbow
You're free to go fly
To a cage in the sky
[Spoken Outro]
Danny: Dad, I need a new Galaxy Hamster!