[Part I: "I Feel Like Masturbating"]

[Verse]
I feel like masturbating 'til my eyes pop out my skull
And I'm drinking 'til my blood turns into wine
I'll crash my car into the river, drowning out my soul
With a gun in my hand in case I don't die

[Part II: "I'm in Love with You (And the Government Is Bad)"]

[Chorus]
I'm in love with you
And the government is bad
Did I mention I'm in love? (Ooh-ooh)

[Instrumental Outro]