[Produced By: The New Royales]

[Intro]
Ahh, mate
A wise man once said
Just as things start looking up
It all goes to shit again
Story of my fucking life!

[Hook]
I'm growing up, growing up, growing up in public
Growing up, growing up, growing up in public
Growing up, growing up, growing up in public
Growing up, growing up, growing up in public

[Verse 1]
They told me to act my age
Maybe one day I'll act it
But for now I'm going backwards, yeah
Lacing up my shoes, buttoning my shirt
I don't know why I'm bothering, you can't polish a turd
Is my tie straight?
I did it and I did it all my way
I told you from the get-go
It was my way or the high way
And I weren't lying then
Ain't lying now, never been a walk over, ain't lying down
It's nothing new to me, the press ain't ever been too nice
I ain't surprised, the headline was about the DUI
[Hook]

[Verse 2]
Think to yourself "what would I have done?"
Somebody popped my watch and then tried to run
We got in a tussle, all the while
I had no idea where my wife had gone, plus I'm poignant on
Whether he's got a gun or a knife on him
Not knowing if her life was in
Danger why I tried to hold on to the watch and fight the [?]
Then I heard her scream, so I'm guessing he bought more guys with him
Fuck the watch, my priority's Millie now
You think what I did was so silly now you've figured it out?
Worked out the reason for me getting into the whip
Not only is this dickhead who got me kicked
And gotten away with my watch, he's gone and gotten me in all of this shit
Shame I never caught up to him in the whip, eh?

[Hook]

[Bridge]
OK, if I'm being logical, in hindsight then probably, it is not a shame that I didn't catch up to the little toerag in the car because that could've ended with me in more trouble than I already am...
DCI Clarke!
Detective Constable Clarke!
I don't like you... at all
We will never, ever be friends
I don't wanna be a criminal! I'm nearly 30 years old! I'm a married man! I wanna move to the country, have children and smoke my... pipe! With nothing illegal in it!
[Hook]