[Round 1: Ubiquitous]
I can see his appeal to the average person watching at home
They see him rhyming they love it, it's no fault of their own
Cause they don't know about formations, set ups, quality flow
Their pick of the winner is hinged on who puts on a comedy show
So he milks his gimmick image, never strays outside his comfort zone
Gay, dick and sister jokes, shit about us colored folks
This used be creative art not doing what is comfortable
But you made it a contest of which rapper has more mother jokes
So simple rhymes for the simple minded, that's just a part of his plan
Using a bunch of sex jokes about my mom and my dad and every Asian joke he possibly can
See I can read his lines cause I know 'em like the palm of my hand
And he's got rebuttals, you know, takes what I say and flips it
I'll admit it, it was cool, the first 50 times you did it
But you do it every round of every battle that you've been in
You don't need to prove you can freestyle we get it
So laugh at his comedy routine, it's whatever dude
The freestyle rebuttal each round that we expect from you
But know that with each generic joke that you subject them to
Every other rapper loses that much more respect for you
[Round 1: Charron]
Yo, he talked about the palm of his hand, I should give him head strikes
The only thing that revolves around the palm of your hand is your sex life
Yo last event he picked me up at the airport and we crashed at his house
Like there's tire tracks on his couch this Asian crashed into his house
Yo celebrate this, I know it's hella racist but your phone number is only listed in the Yellow Pages
Yo, he don't smoke weed at all, he just washed dishes and does quantum physics
I hit trees with bongs, you hit trees with Honda Civics
Yo, so when your rap party's getting fried out, bong hits
As your best friend dialing vomits
He's screaming while he's working on his science projects
"I'm high off knowledge, I love college!"
You and your family are physicians this is more of a slaughter
I'll stomp your pregnant mother, poor man abortion the toddler
Stick a fork in her daughter, Chinese torture your father
And give this country a fucking reason why there's a shortage of doctors
First place is something you've never really done
Your family had a Jackie Chan look alike contest and everybody won
[Round 2: Ubiquitous]
He only turned to rap cause he got bullied lots
Slapped behind the tears but the veterans know you're getting worse with every line they hear
So while you turned to rap to be accepted by your peers
They all hung you out to dry cause you're still wet behind your ears
That's why we ain't even in the same class
GM vers' a Maybach
Beating you is payback for thievery of A-Class
Thought he changed the game but your rebuttaling is played
Try to go against the grain but still a needle in a haystack
And you're not Puff or Big, Blood or Crip, brandishing the weapon
Just a fucking punk fronting with a natural aggression
A youngin so I had to give him lessons
So I don't need to fuck a bitch to son a kid; immaculate conception
And you talk a lot of game for someone without an awful lot to say
You think you're hot off the top 'til I knock it off like the Rock Em Sock Em game
And you're garbage which is why you'll never profit off your name
Your lyrics are about as good as Waka Flaka Flame
I feel like a peace keeper, in the Middle East I keep heaters
Heavy armor, metal choppers, helicopters
Heat seekers, rebel martyrs, daily bombers, peasant archers, street sweepers
Men of honor to petty robbers, bow to your supreme leader
[Round 2: Charron]
He wants to talk about the immaculate conception
Your father jerked off in a Holiday Inn after smoking crack on Intervention
Your mother is a maid who actually got pregnant
But humping the motel mattress with aggression
So technically you were conceived during immaculate conception
You're a virgin with no stripes, you don't have to be told twice
Cause you've had that Arnold Schwarzenegger haircut your whole life
You have such low self esteem that nothing helps
You're so pathetic that during sex you fantasize you're someone else
I know the rest you're so depressed you hope for death and nothing else
Shit it's amazing that this Asian hasn't fucking William Hung himself
Shatter his teeth, a beat down all of Calgary sees
Like when Cody The Catch with some transit police
It actually seems you got buff and it's weird
He thinks he's hot stuff and it's clear
Cause now he flex when he talks tough to the mirror like "Not up in here!"
In the Grand Prix your partner was dope but you choked like every round
It was like you were eating a Cheese string, slowly pulling Chedda down
I bet you've never won a staring contest
He nodded
Every time I have a conversation with you it looks like you're sleep talking
I bet Conceited's hype man makes you hungry
Yo I'ma rape this fucker so I guess that makes you Underdog...like your plates at supper
When Fredo interrupted his bars he's like, "He keep cutting me off oh my dear."
Well it's funny cause your people been cutting me off on the road for years
[Round 3: Ubiquitous]
Before traveling to Calgary his family saw him to the bus stop
But they wouldn't let him leave unless they let them pack his lunchbox
So he grabbed some snacks and set off with half a pack of Gumdrops
And little jam sandwiches his grandma cut the crust off
Yo, I'm glad you made it, manned up and put down the finger paint
Cause I'm 'bout to go HAM like someone giving up their religious faith
I'm off the wall like a ricochet, I'm riding on him like an interstate
I spit it so sophisticated you still struggle spelling "illiterate"
{Chokes}
Yo, and this kid is barely potty trained, this tot's afraid to talk to strangers
It's obvious his body frame does not obey the laws of nature
If I stomped his scrawny legs they'd pop and break like rotting grapes
And you will never walk away and walk again like Charles Xavier
And when Barton fought that Zilla kid, your heart went into chronic failure
Cause this lame's afraid to take a hit like he's a soccer player
Always feeling paranoid, thinking he's in constant danger
So when things get heated Corey disappears like water vapor
So why's this chump up in my fucking face, running game that's suffocated
Wanna brawl? Let's get it in, I know kung fu I'm fucking Asian
Hit you with the right to left the uppercut, the combination
You won't even know what side I'm on like a double agent
And I didn't want to take it there I have to
So I really came prepared for this cracker
How I'm gonna lose to the lame in the game with the same damn facial hair as my grandma
Yo and I wish this bitch had picked a different hobby, Mr. Ricky Bobby
Little bitch you getting ripped, you wishy washy busy body
Do the math like Fibonacci, I got arms like Vince Lombardi
Dominate the game like Sidney Crosby playing women's hockey
And this sport requires diligence, confidence and vigilance
That's why you've never gotten good cause Corey lacks the discipline
Thank your lucky stars that I am going into medicine
Cause you gon' need a motherfucking doctor when I finish him
[Round 3: Charron]
Yo this guy is a fucker
You're so Asian that your eyelids are sunburned
The only person that will need a doctor when you're finished with them, is your driving instructor
Ubiquitous means being omniscient like God who's seeing us right now
The definition for Ubiquitous is being everywhere, you don't leave your fucking house
I partied with Sketch, Nebula, Daley when I was there for a week
Shit, I got drunk with Bruce B homie rest in peace
The definition for Ubiquitous is being everywhere so don't forget what it means
Cause when it comes time to party in Calgary you're nowhere to be seen
You're a fairy and queen, no one's gayer than this little bitch
On the flamboyant scale there's "metro", "bi-sexual", "full out gay" then "Ubiquitous"
...then "Fresco"
Who wants to party in Calgary? To see him is so rare
I ask, "Where the hell's Ubiquitous?" and people just don't care
Tonight I'm wearing a cowboy hat exhaling weed in your own air
Watching FUBAR in a Flames jersey while I'm eating at Donair
I don't go to church or believe in above
The only GOD I listen to is the Genius On Drugs
I loved [?] you've never heard of the dude
I know it hurts and it's true
It's crazy but in a way I'm more Albertan than you
Your mother's obese and I'm a handsome fellow
Every time I see that big bitch I start screaming "Fat & Yellow, Fat & Yellow"
Yo, I've battled many Asians I'm a flawless MC
Killed Syco then I jumped to the top of the league
Slaughtered A-Class, now Ubiquitous, I bodied him in three
I've murdered so many Asians they'll have to name the next tsunami after me