[LAWRENCE]
Left hand, side pocket
Right arm, akimbo and relaxed
Head up, gaze steady
Now you're ready so you
Stroll in, survey them
Your world, they're all invited guests
Feel out how to play them
And remember this:
You're giving them what they want—

[ANDRE]
Za ba zoovee!

[LAWRENCE]
Giving them what they want
An adventure all their own

[LAWRENCE & ANDRE]
Giving them what they want

[LAWRENCE]
Like they're in a movie
And never forget that what they want is—
Half smile
[ANDRE]
Demi sourire!

[LAWRENCE]
David Niven

[ANDRE]
Put on a—

[LAWRENCE & ANDRE]
Bold countenance, both tragic and amused

[LAWRENCE]
High style

[ANDRE]
Ah, comme il faut!

[LAWRENCE]
That's a given

[ANDRE]
And don't forget

[LAWRENCE]
All I'm doing is, I'm—
[LAWRENCE, ANDRE & CHORUS WOMEN]
Giving them what they want

[LAWRENCE & ANDRE]
Doo ba zootie!

[LAWRENCE, ANDRE & CHORUS WOMEN]
Specifically what they want

[LAWRENCE]
All tied up with a bow
For as the poet said—

[ANDRE]
Keats!

[CHORUS WOMEN]
"Truth is beauty"

[LAWRENCE]
—And that is all you really
Need to know

[LENORE]
Your Grace!
[LAWRENCE]
This Lady is Lenore
She feels her life's become a bore
You see her husband's
Ninety-four this May
Buy hey, shes down for fifty mil
In an addendum to his will
And wherever there's a will
There is a way!
I always say—

[ALL]
Give them what they want

[LAWRENCE & ANDRE]
Smooth and breezy

[ALL]
Exactly what they want

[LENORE]
An escape from the ennui

[ALL]
Give them what they want

[ANDRE]
Nothing cheap or cheesy

[LAWRENCE]
Remember what they really want is—

[ANDRE]
Exhibit B:

[LAWRENCE]
Sophia, loaded down with lira
Spied a grey hair in the mirror
So she made a resolution to cut loose

Her family fortune is obscene
Her dad invented Orangina
Now sit back and watch
While I turn up the juice—

[ENSEMBLE]
Top of the illusion
For fantasy, the man to see is you
And so in conclusion
All you're doing is you're—

[ALL]
Giving them what they want

[LENORE]
Fire

[SOPHIA]
And passion

[ALL]
Exactly what they want

[LAWRENCE]
And never close the door

[ENSEMBLE]
Giving them what they want

[ANDRE]
'Til it's time to cash in

[LAWRENCE]
And then you've got to leave them wanting—

[ALL]
More, more, more
More, more, more!

Give them what they want
Give them what they want
Give them what they want

Some sugar in their tea

Give them what they want!

[LAWRENCE]
Here, I'll make it easy:
Remember, what they really want is—

[ENSEMBLE]
What we really want is
Ahh...

[LAWRENCE]
Me

[ENSEMBLE]
Mais oui!