Carl Johnson:
Yo, look at this crunk shit, I'm battling a pink blob

Watch me pull out my gun, pop pop, just like CoD!

I'd rather play Panoramio than watch your damn show

Think twice before fucking with the homie from the Grove!

Your humor's outdated, what, are you living under a rock?

Oops... I didn't realize you were that dumb, I forgot!

Your own neighbor hates you, man, when will you be done?

Hell, your only fucking friend is a drugged up yellow sponge!

Patrick Star:
Yo, my name is Patrick Star, I can play instruments

Wait... is mayonaisse an instrument? No... ridiculous

I'll send you to Rock Bottom, so suck my yellow head

After I win, I'll stick a golden star on this prick
You're just jealous, 'cause I'm Squidward, I'm Squidward, Squidward, Squidward

You're just stupid like Texas, I'll shrink you likе wumbo, you nerd!

I'm underwaaaater bitch, you look likе some steam

When you lose, just do what I do when I have problems, SCREAM!

Carl Johnson:
Yo homie, you're just angry 'cause you can't see your forehead!

Frankendoodle bowled off your head, but at least he gets more head!

Bitch ass-hole, you look like some pink jelly

I'll murder you like I did to Freddy

Alan, Andre, Little Weasy, Jizzy B

Kane, Lance, Bone Mendez, with a T

Snakehead, Witness, Edward, and Benny

Big Poppa, Melvin, and mother fucking Marco Forelli!

Patrick Star:
You're uglier than the ugly Cuntitty named Dickle the Nickel
And your dickle has more warts than Kevin the Pickle!

You're just jealous 'cause I'm Squidward, I'm Squidward, I'm Squidward

You're just stupid like Texas, I'll shrink you like wumbo you nerd!

I'm the Star of this battle, I'll stab you like a needle

And I'll ride victory like a pirate ship, LEEDLE LEEDLE LEEDLE!

Once there was an ugly barnacle named Carl

He was ugly that everyone died.... the end