[Intro]
Hey I love you I wanna be with you-uh no that's stupid
Uh, hi princess-no
What?
Hey how are you doing today queen?
I'm traveling with Tyrone, what do you want London?
Yeah I just, y'know, wanted to send some money today
Oh yeah, can you actually send that two hundred?
Oh yeah, of course I can actually-

[Chorus]
Stop calling me a simp
I am not a simp
I love her she loves me back
We're in a relationship
It's been two years and I ain't get a kiss
I don't need it though
Physical relations can't compare to this
We're in love on some L-O-V-E
Comment on her pictures, then I send her money
That's my baby, that's my sugar wooger lady, never do her shady, maybe in a couple years will seal the deal

[Verse 1]
Just to keep it real, I wish she didn't have a boyfriend though
Bought them tickets to Flog Gnaw, they told me that I couldn't go
So I stayed home and scrolled through all her posts
I saw you call her gross, she's actually a queen so you should hit the road
Fucking idiot
All the clothes she wears, I bought that shit
Clearly me and her are close as balls and dick (I love you princess)
She let's me in her house, I watch her cats while she's on trips
Cotton is my favorite cat, he snuggles me and sprays his piss
I clean her toilet, wash her dishes, and took out the trash
I texted her this morning she ain't hit me back
She probably sleeping in
She always tells me there's a lot on her mind
And that's the only reason me and her, never spend time
I love you so much girl, god you're so fine
And I do respect your boundaries, I will never cross that line (I don't need a hug)
Your boyfriend's lucky that I know he's a good guy, even though that one time I showed up unexpected and he punched me in my eye
[Skit]
What little n***a?
Hey Mr. Tyrone, um, I was just in the neighborhood and I was thinking uh maybe I just stop by and see Lauren, is she here?
She ain't here
Can I help you?
Hey, uh, I think I see her, that's her right there, right? Is that her back there? I think I see her

[Chorus]
Stop calling me a simp
I am not a simp
I love her she loves me back
We're in a relationship
It's been two years and I ain't get a kiss
I don't need it though
Physical relations can't compare to this
We're in love on some L-O-V-E
Comment on her pictures, then I send her money
That's my baby, that's my sugar wooger lady, never do her shady, maybe in a couple years will seal the deal

[Verse 2]
I got a lifetime subscription of OnlyFans account
Her boyfriend moaning in the videos, I just turn the volume down
I always tip on every post because my queen deserves a crown
And I'ma be there with her when Tyrone let her down
See me and her had loved each other for a long while
Remember when I met her couldn't speak, all I did was smile
Two summers ago, swiped right, it was a perfect match
She told me how she's struggling and I couldn't have that
So I Uber'd her to my apartment 'cause I don't have a car
Even though it wasn't that far
She showed up looking gorgeous, I remember losing control of my heart
She said she's super hungry, so we got a lift of Walmart
I bought her over six hundred dollars worth of groceries, but most importantly she held my hand in the back of the Uber
I brought her straight home, went in for the kiss, she pulled a strange maneuver
Even if it takes my whole life, I'ma get through to her
[Chorus]
Stop calling me a simp
I am not a simp
I love her she loves me back
We're in a relationship
It's been two years and I ain't get a kiss
I don't need it though
Physical relations can't compare to this
We're in love on some L-O-V-E
Comment on her pictures, then I send her money
That's my baby, that's my sugar wooger lady, never do her shady, maybe in a couple years will seal the deal
Stop-Stop calling me a simp
I am not a simp
I love her she loves me back
We're in a relationship
It's been two years and I ain't get a kiss
I don't need it though
Physical relations can't compare to this
We're in love on some L-O-V-E
Comment on her pictures, then I send her money
That's my baby, that's my sugar wooger lady, never do her shady, maybe in a couple years will seal the deal