Neil Patrick Harris
The Ballad of Czolgosz
[BALLADEER]
Czolgosz
Working man
Born in the middle of Michigan
Woke with a thought and away he ran
To the Pan-American Exposition
In Buffalo
In Buffalo

Saw all of a sudden how things were run
Said, "Time's a-wasting, it's Nineteen-One
Some men have everything and some have none
So rise and shine
In the U.S.A. 
You can work your way
To the head of the line!"

[ATTENDANT, spoken]
Single line, ladies and gentlemen. Line forms here to meet the President of the United States. Single line to shake hands with President William McKinley!

[BALLADEER]
Czolgosz
Quiet man
Worked out a quiet and simple plan
Strolled of a morning, all spick and span
To the Temple of Music
By the Tower of Light
At the Pan-American Exposition
In Buffalo
In Buffalo
Saw Bill McKinley there in the sun
Heard Bill McKinley say, "Folks, have fun!
Some men have everything and some have none
But that's just fine
In the U.S.A. 
You can work your way
To the head of the line!"

[FAIRGOERS]
Big Bill—!

[BALLADEER]
—Gave 'em a thrill

[FAIRGOERS]
Big Bill—!

[BALLADEER]
—Sold 'em a bill

[FAIRGOERS]
Big Bill—!

[BALLADEER]
Who'd want to kill
A man of good will
Like—
[FAIRGOERS]
Big Bill!

[FAIRGOER #1, spoken]
Doesn't the President look marvelous? So round and prosperous!

[FAIRGOER #2, spoken]
Do you know what his favorite dish is? It was in the papers. Beef!

[FAIRGOER #3, spoken]
I'm told that in his spare time, he enjoys collecting coins!

[FAIRGOER #4, spoken]
Want a sip?

[CZOLGOSZ, spoken]
No thank you. 

[BALLADEER]
Czolgosz
Angry man
Said, "I will do what a poor man can
Yes, and there's nowhere more fitting than
In the Temple of Music
By the Tower of Light
Between the Fountain of Abundance
And the Court of Lilies
At the great Pan-American Exposition
In Buffalo
In Buffalo."
Wrapped him a handkerchief around his gun
Said, "Nothin' wrong about what I done
Some men have everything and some have none—
That's by design
The idea wasn't mine alone, but mine—
And that's the sign."

In the U.S.A. 
You can have your say
You can set your goals
And seize the day
You've been given the freedom
To work your way
To the head of the line—
To the head of the line!