[NEIL]
The Emmy Awards are three hours long
There's still ninety minutes to go
But time is just right to sing you a song
Called "The Number in the Middle of the Show"

At this point a host could choose just to coast
To that I say thank you, but no
Some give you their least, I give you my most
Hence this number in the middle of the show

Opening numbers are so old hats
Even Hugh Jackman does stuff like that
Closing numbers are just goodbye
It's number in the middle that gets me high

(spoken)
Hi

(sung)
So this time around, we'rе trying something new
To help rе-establish the flow
And now without any further ado
Here's some really sexy dancing in the middle of the number that's the number in the middle of the show

(spoken)
Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the Emmy gold dancers
[FEMALE SINGERS]
Here's just a little bit
More of the middle bit
Here's just a little bit
More of the middle bit

[NEIL, spoken]
Hey! Versatile actor Nathan "Castle" Fillion and Emmy-winning comedian Sarah "The Sarah Silverman Program" Silverman, what are you two doing here?

[NATHAN, spoken]
Neil, when we saw you start singing we were blown away

[NEIL, spoken]
Thanks!

[SARAH, spoken]
We knew we had to be a part of it, Neil

[NEIL, spoken]
So you just arranged this cameo in the last like ninety seconds?

[SARAH, spoken]
We have great publicists

[NATHAN, spoken]
Shut up, I'm gonna sing
(sung)
A solo in the number in the middle of the show
You can't spell cameo without me

[SARAH]
We're completely live so I'm really gonna try
Not to say vagina on TV

[NEIL, spoken]
Alright Sarah, couldn't have not said it better myself

(sung)
I could dance forever, 'cause I want more
More of the guy who held me up before
But we're running tight so now we need to flow
To the beginning of the end of the middle of the show

[NEIL, NATHAN, SARAH & BACKGROUND SINGERS]
The Emmy Awards are three hours long
Now there's three minutes fewer to go

[NATHAN, SARAH & BACKGROUND SINGERS]
Thanks to this extraordinary

[NEIL]
Completely arbitrary
[NEIL, NATHAN, SARAH & BACKGROUND SINGERS]
Number in the middle of the show

[BACKGROUND SINGERS]
In the middle of the
In the middle of the
In the middle of the
Of the show