i need some candy
to restore my calmness
i’ve had some crazy
freak outs lately
i kicked all my shit
around my closet
nobody is coming
to tell me to stop it

my shoes
they scuffed
my white walls
i punched my
cupcake beanbag
(yes, i have a cupcake beanbag)
til i fell tired and
embarrassed enough
and i was careless enough

[chorus]
feeling like a dick
picking it up again
feeling so much like a dick
just to pick it up again
feeling so so so
so tired
of feeling so so so
so dumb
i stomped and
i screamed there
flinging ideas
straight down from the halls
like in a movie scene where
all of you watch behind a glass wall
i’m pacing back and fourth
exhausting myself
for my own gratification
to no one
embarrassing programming

and when i find the mess in the floor
temper tantrum over
reorganizing all that i tore
from life’s rightful order
i'll say i
learned some sort of lesson
when i felt dumb enough
to question

( i wish that i could take it back
but where to start
but where you at
fucking up my photographs
I’m loosing it )
feeling like a dick
picking it all up again
so much like a dick
just to pick it up again
everything is so so so
so tired
everything is so so so
so dumb