You played the part of the one who was taken down by dogs
All I could think about was how a guy like me could fight them off
And when you finally submitted to embarrassing capture
Out of the corner of my eye I see my children in rapture

One night I got up and told my father there were witches in my room
He gave me a baseball bat and said here's what you do
When you have finally submitted to embarrassing capture
Take out that baseball bat and show those witches some pasture

All you guys out there tryin' to act like Al Green
All you guys out there tryin' to act like Al Green, you're all weak
Cause when you've finally submitted to embarrassing capture
All you guys out there gonna wish you were Al Green