In a fortnight's time you will be mine
I'll bide my time
You're a paradigm of womankind
You could be mine
I disgust myself, but I've got to try…
I catch your eye

Would you like to go on a date with me?
And I know it's old-fashioned to say so
Five times five equals twenty five
Don't you know your times tables by now?
O-who
Don't you know?

On the last train home, you wanna phone
Instead, you rub your eyes
The reflection's grim in the windowpane
It's the human stain
So, you have a drink to erase the day…
There's another way

Would you like to go on a date with me?
And I know it's old-fashioned to say so
Five times five equals twenty five
Don't you know your times tables by now?
O-who
Don't you know?

When it comes to girls, I'm mostly hypothetical
If I list their names, it's purely alphabetical
When it comes to girls, I'm truly theoretical
If I test their nerve, it's merely dialectical

And so…
Would you like to go on a date with me?
And I know it's old-fashioned to say so
Five times five equals twenty five
Don't you know your times tables by now?
O-who
Don't you know?
I said, don't you know?

In fortnights time you will be mine
You will be mine