Primary (프라이머리)
Primary - 독 (Poison) (English Translation)
After time passes, dust settles on the memories
As time passes, poison builds up in my body
These days, I want to be more free than before
I am exactly half dead these days
I couldn’t see it with my eyes but I believed it
I definitely felt that it pulled me forward
I remember that start and I empty out all the things that made me rot
I need to hold onto the things I was losing
The long journey till now
With clenched fists, when they said having faith was everything
I ridiculed everyone because they seemed scared and worn out
But on the contrary, they scared me
I thought I couldn’t help but to turn out like them later on
So I tried to look at reality straight on
Reality says it wants to run but is more comfortable sitting down
Each time, it lies to you and me like that
My mind was out of it because of the cigarette-like comfort
The hidden meaning behind “you’ll know when you grow up”
Is only a hypnosis – it doesn’t mean you’re getting wiser
You’re just living peacefully like a dog tied up on a leash
That’s the only thing that I learned so
Mustering up courage is as scary as other people’s eyes
I got so sick of them that I told them to piss off
The place my faith took me was my home
If I have a chance to go to the place that perfects me
I’ll be better than you, who is like an empty outer shell because of your set-aside dreams
So you can laugh at me all you want
You can pretend you’re worried about me while hiding your own failure
If you don’t wanna get hurt, just be quiet
They say that it’s common sense
Cowardice becomes medicine in this world but
I respect everyone who was scarred instead of you
I bless everyone who overcame
I once fell into a deep hole
I pretended nothing was wrong in front of family and friends
My own disgust and pride was mixed together
So I even hated looking into the eyes in the mirror
The draining of my passion
The actions that I hated doing more than anyone else
After those actions became my work, I felt like I was dying
I couldn’t feel anything else properly
I saw my twisted self but I couldn’t kill myself
Even if I throw away everything I have far away somewhere
It seemed like it wouldn’t be a waste back then
I tiresomely searched for anything that could be a comfort like a crazy person
Peace was something that had nothing to do with me
I raised my voice to hide my anxiety
I angrily chattered about stories of my pride
I wandered and was dizzy
I didn’t even know if anyone was next to me back then
I didn’t believe in a God back then but I couldn’t believe my ruined self either
I couldn’t grasp a clear answer for a long time
A tough and severe cold seeped through my conscience
No matter how many hours I slept, my mornings weren’t refreshing
Uneasiness and a sense of oppression crushed my youth
In place of the foam, the traps and chances, came the temptations
In front of all those things, I need to go back to the start
I need to hold onto the things I was losing
If I rush to follow along, I keep forgetting which one is me
If I rush to follow along, I keep forgetting which one is me
If you need to stop, then stop now
We lose too many important things in life
If I rush to follow along, I keep forgetting which one is me