Your Favorite Martian
Date Myself
[Intro]
You ever feel like you're dating the same type of person over and over again?

[Chorus]
She said she's not really into me (Nope)
She said we ain't got no chemistry (What?)
She said she's already sick of me (Aw)
Oh well, well, well, well, well, well

[Verse 1]
I'm getting sick and tired of the first dates
I'm doing my best but they just go South (Damn!)
I never should've tried in the first place
I should've just stayed back at my housе
It feels like a damn job interview
I gotta imprеss her with who I am
Plus I gotta pay for the dinner too
Why does it feel like I just got scammed? (Aww!)
I'm not that impressive, I'm way below average
I live with my grandma, my bank's overdrafted
My band's gonna make it, one day it'll happen
So why do I do it? I hate all this madness (grr!)
I feel like I could be a perfect mate but it's useless
Whenever I ask for a second date, they always make excuses
Come on
[Chorus]
She said she's not really into me
She said we ain't got no chemistry
She said she's already sick of me
Oh well, I'm just gonna date myself

[Post-Chorus]
I don't like anyone else
I'm gonna date myself
I don't like anyone else
I'm gonna date myself

[Verse 2]
Dating myself is pretty amazing
There's a lot of things we have similar taste in (Yup)
He plays Skyrim and Civilization
His favorite bagel, cinnamon raisin (Hey)
His jokes are funny, I'm always laughing
He dresses nice, we're always matching
He's good at rapping, his beats are slapping
And plus, he's really attractive (Damn)
We like the same movies (Yeah)
We got the same passions
We eat the same food
"I'll have what he's having"
I was just trying to find myself, and now I'm beside myself
The last girl that I was with said "Go fuck yourself"
So I did (Come here!)
[Chorus]
She said she's not really into me (Nope)
She said we ain't go no chemistry (Yeah, we do)
She said she's already sick of me (Hey!)
Oh well, I'm just gonna date myself

[Post-Chorus]
I don't like anyone else
I'm gonna date myself
I don't like anyone else
I'm gonna date myself

[Bridge]
I'm getting sick and tired of the worst dates
I'm doing my best but they just go South (damn)
I never should've tried in the first place
I should've just stayed back at my house (Aw)
And now a couple of months of gone by
I can't believe we're still dating (Still?)
'Cause now I can't stand the guy
I think I'm starting to hate him
He's not that impressive, he's way below average
He lives with his grandma, his bank's overdrafted
His band really sucks, they'll never make it
He's not that attractive, especially when naked (Dude)
I'm breaking up with him, I'm kicking him out
The issue with that is he lives in my house (Hey!)
The more that I'm with him, the more that I see
The problem ain't him, the problem is me (Huh?)
[Chorus]
He said I'm not really into me (No)
He said we ain't got no chemistry (We don't)
He said I'm already sick of me (Go away)
Oh well, I'm not gonna date myself

[Post-Chorus]
I want someone else (Someone else)
I don't wanna date myself (Date myself)
I want someone else (Anyone but me)
I don't wanna date myself (No!)

[Outro]
And so it turns out he was cheating on me the whole time
With another me, so, yeah