Freshy Kanal
JAWS vs. The Loch Ness Monster
[Intro]
RAP BATTLE!
THE LOCH NESS MONSTER
VS
JAWS
BEGIN
[Verse 1: The Loch Ness Monster]
The monstrous top myth haunting the Loch Ness
Compared to me, you're just a drop in the faucet
A fish out of the water, don't travel to Scotland
Or I'll break you down like your animatronic
I only need one line to be taking you out
The only food chain you're on top of is the bait in your mouth
I'm not debating your crowd, but you're not special 'cuz you're making charts
You're the least scary cash-grab ever since "Baby Shark"
I'm a star attraction, you get beaches blocked off
I'll leave your mouth wide open, call that "Loch jaw"
Toss you in the bin 'cuz even tasting all the plastic
You still rock the crown as "The Biggest Waste in the Atlantic"
[Verse 2: Jaws]
I chomp on a speedboat dropped in the east coast
Now I'm here to roast a prehistoric meatloaf
Nice scam you got running
You got millions of civillians to visit a lake, TO DO NOTHING!!
Your stories lead hoards of suckers to keep searching
But all your cheap lore is more hollow than your Earth is
You'll hit the seafloor when this giant starts emerging
You're gonna need more than A PHOTO FROM A SURGEON!!
Remember the fisherman that I left to scream and cry?
That's literally me when I first saw your CGI
You're bound to stay low on Rotten Tomatoes
Your flicks are stored in the same boat as Sharknado!
[Verse 3: The Loch Ness Monster]
Leaving Bruce is bruises 'cuz I'm cruel with it
Today I find you finless, for two nickels in the soup kitchen
Your editing crew's vision caused your films to plummet
Want to be scary? You're gonna need a bigger budget
If you're out for blood then get a taste
This rubber dummy's bound to get erased
Jumping the shark for some extra bank
You died like your franchise, BLEW UP AND YOU TANKED!!
[Verse 4: Jaws]
It's about time you got the hook
And I snap you, but I don't eat books
I'm Spielberg's first classic
You look like he scrapped your giraffe ass from The Jurassic!
I'm a fraud crusher leaving any kind of fish smothered
Started blockbusters while you got ended by MythBusters
Playing hide and seek all day in the lake you're confined to
Such a pussy, you need gynaecologists to find you!
Hear the end of your tale, means you're just a skeptic
See the end of my tail, means you'll get a wrecked ship
You can try to swim away but you're too slow
ONCE I'M IN SCOTLAND, YOU'LL WANT THE LAND TO BE YOUR NEW HOME!!!
[Outro]
WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
THE NEXT RAP BATTLE IS ON THE WAY!