[Intro]
Lets give it up for
STARK's RAP BATTLES!

Henry Stickmin!
Versus
Phil Eggtree!
Begin!

[Verse 1: Henry]
The father of newgrounds is bound
To ground this unpunny flashhack
Who thinks he can step to Stickmin
Guess he hasn't seen my clapback

Henry chooses Gas Raps to combat
Phil's not-so-Swift sadness
Even your OG design adds up
To complete Madness

I mean you're messing with the best
Mercenary since Red or Blue
My games are a blast, when I bring laughs
No one can say the same about you

So riddle me this, if you can
We know you're not the sharpest
Bulb in the shed
How can you claim to have fame
When your'e put to shame by another egg?
Who's got a 98% rating on Steam? Me!
Who's game birthed a dev team and
Whole company from a meme?
But then who's schtick got old fast
With each recurring scheme?

Cause it's not me who's cranking sequels
Just to make ends meet Geez!

[Verse 2: Phil]
A whole decade for your first words?
I must say i'm thrilled
In this scrap, you're getting capped
Regardless of the gimmicks you instill

Just a bully taking dollars
But got no digits on the weight scale
So come at me Stick Bug
This loss'll be your 348th fail!

Spitting colder than Zack
-er hotter than Zack
A twig'll get snapped when im on the attack
But if I tried to sit through your whack class
Id end up falling asleep on the track
Stickmin's just a Ghost Inmate
So there's no need to keep my guard up
Hard to Escape Prison when you've been
Surrounded by my bars, huh?

I'll be the one collecting coin
While you're lacking common cents
And after all your countless antics
I'd think you'd grasp some common sense

With all those video game tie-ins
You constantly seem to harp
For one who prides himself on intelligence
That wasn't very... pointy

Once I crack the case of this Basket Case
Then he'll truly see that
When it comes to tricking teachers or ditching
Class, I always have the key

You're no Valiant Hero
You ditched from the army to pinch more cash
Just a selfish thief with jealous deeds
I've got this in the bag! (Ha!)

[Verse 3: Henry]
I toppled the Toppats, Government, Wall
You know I pack the sleek flow too
Your whole deal is. "bargain bin
Ferris Bueller with a dash of Pico's School
But if you really wanna compare us
I'll serve this Egghead over easy
My countless achievements to
Your minor victories?
Hmmm, lets see

Small startup gains some traction
Gauging YouTubers' reactions
Yet you couldn't hold a fraction
To the sweet deals that im packin'

Banks, Prisons, Airships, Complexes
I've beat them all, and then-
What did you do, that's new?
Oh yeah! Escaped school... again...

Priceless gems? I steal em
Brighter friends? You need em
I'm breakin' Banks and taking tanks
You use plot holes for your freedom!

No matter what you point and click
I top your "Legacy Edition" anyday
But it seems like i had no trouble
"Completing the Diss-ion" anyway!

[Verse 4: Phil]
This beaver's spittin' 'gainst this bread crumb
From the internet's trash can
After countless parodies, this rash
Distraction's at his last stand

Tried to capitalize on nostalgia
Relying on tired gaming cliches
While I've been going strong for many years
And I'm still free to play! (Ay!)

Your lines are paper thin
Cutting less than your "valid stingers"
I've seen sicker stick figure spitters
Come out of Salad Fingers

No matter what the timeline
That whole verse was your lamest sad jam
Mission Failed! You shoulda stuck with Charles
If you wanted the Greatest Rap Plan (Oh!)