[Verse 1: Garden Gnome]
I keep the lawn in order
While you're chilling in the armchair
I’ve seen a lotta gardens
But you got that thousand yard stare
A Dunham puppet dud?
I'm the G-gnome from the projects
Only got you out of storage
To ream holes in your cobwebs
King put you on the shelf
Chilled with Stephen for a minute
Then he knocked you off the perch
Now you're sleeping with the fishes
Tried to creep in with your demons
But the teens ain’t superstitious
You're a birthday gift for kids
And on the flea market by Christmas
Keep the blick up on my Poarch
Cuz this ain't build a bitch
Pulled together by some stitches
You're built to be a snitch
I can see your fear is building
I'm sprinting for the whip
Cuz I know this Chimp will throw
When he's been shitting some bricks, ha!
[Verse 2: Cymbal Chimp]
Pull up on your block
Leave your fence riddled
I'mma bang your mom
That's a sex cymbal
Her and I converge behind
The curtains while you work at night
Gardening activities
You would say she’s fertilized
Early fight, I work the mic
By flashing all these pearly whites
To show something disturbing might
Occur to this suburbanite
Had all this time
And your fashion sense is still hideous
I know I like hi hats
But this is getting ridiculous
Bitch, you look like someone
Dropped a snow cone on an old man
I’ll grip the metal, put it
To your gnome dome with both hands
If you're looking for a Juliet
She’s probably far from home
This Gnomeo ain't making em wet
He got no garden hoes
Ragged bearded outside cat
Smelling like garlic cloves
You've been barring in the garden
Way too long, you artichoked

[Verse 3: Garden Gnome]
My sales are as high
As your confidence isn't
Got those Aardman teeth
And you’re not even British
I'll fuck you up in your haunted ass prison
And tell the Warrens I did it
Give this conjuring chimp
A conjugal visit
Don't run up in my subdivision
Or I'mma hit you with something vicious
The urban jungle ain't monkey business
What I spin turns gold like Rumpelstilzchen
So whyn't you pick up a rusty cymbal
With your tippy toes, kick the bucket with it
If you come to visit, I'mma kick your ass back
To the factory where your butt was printed


[Verse 4: Cymbal Chimp]
Actually, I just got back
Said hi to your replacement
And the hundred thousand more
That they had tied up in the basement
If you think that I'm generic
Careful who you turn that lamp on
Maybe talk to those flamingos
If you need a leg to stand on
Ask me to stop torturing
This small corpulent lawn ornament
I'm not bored of it yet. You tried to be
Don Porcelain, stopped short of it
I drop choruses, shots swarming in
Monkey bars, so you're falling off
Sorry that I murdered Doofenshmirtz
Before his balls had dropped