[Intro]
Ehh...
Ha-ha-ha!

There's an old Australian stockman – uh – rock band. Trying, but dying. They get themselves up onto their collective elbows. Revert to their ’60s instrumentation. And they try again...

[Verse 1]
There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold
And she’s buying a stairway to Heaven
Altogether now!
(And she's buying a stairway to Heaven)

Now, when she gets there she knows, if those stores are all closed
With a word she can get what she came for...
Altogеther now!
(With a word she can get what shе came for...)

[Chorus]
Ooh, and it makes me wonder!
How does it affect you blokes?
(Ooh, and it makes us wonder)
That's it – just like that, yeah

[Verse 2]
There's a sign on the wall but she wants to be sure
'Cos you know sometimes words have two meanings
Altogether now!
('Cos you know sometimes words have two meanings)
A lot of words have two meanings. Um, like, in this song – the word 'to buy'. ’Buying a stairway to Heaven.’ 'Bought’. No wait, that's 'brought', the other one. Oh, um... There’s lots of words, have two meanings...

[Verse 3]
In a tree by the brook, there's a songbird who sings
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven
Altogether now!
(Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven)

Misgiven? Just, uh, change instruments now. Thank you very much. 'Miss Given', ladies and gentlemen... Is it nice to have your name mentioned in the song? Yeah, isn't it good? Haha! Lovely lady. [Clears throat]

[Bridge]
Quick burst of applause for Ross there... On the free-trembler. Can I change instruments again? Thank you. [Clears throat]. Nearly finished. Hahaha! [Clears throat]

[Verse 4]
There's a lady, I'm sure that I've mentioned before – yeah, I did, yeah
And she's buying a stairway to Heaven
Altogether now!
(And she's buying a stairway to Heaven)

[Chorus]
Ooh, makes me wonder
(Ooh, and it makes us wonder)
(Ooh, and it makes us wonder)
(It makes us wonder!)
Hahaha!