[DOOFENSHMIRTZ]
How does a duck-billed, beaver-tailed mammal always wearing a fedora
Thwart all of my schemes with such aplomb and with persistence
Consistently reduces my net gain to zero
Who is this teal-colored hero?
A monotreme who came from south of the equator
Became a crusader, a real instigator
A tiny gladiator, and eleven minutes later
Here I am, and he’s destroyed all of my -inators
Every day he gets his mission, nеver asks for my permission
To be fair, it’s not a dif-dif-difficult dеcision
It says “Evil” on my building, so I’m always under suspicion
He just shows up with a music sting and beats me to submission
It’s starting to get me down, and I’ve got to place blame, man
All my thwarted schemes really make me feel so lame, man
Though I enjoy his visits, I’m so sick of the same
Imagine if he never came

[NORM]
Who do you mean, sir?

[DOOFENSHMIRTZ]
Perry the Platypus
His name is Perry the Platypus
And there’s not a lot we can discuss
But that’s okay
That’s okay