[DEB]
Dear Professor Thompson
Hey, it's Deb! How are things going?
Heard your latest book is done, can't wait to read it—ah!—buy it

In the meantime I've one teeny little question to propose to you:
As one academic to another academic
Have you ever, say, misplaced
A whole entire book containing your research?
Oh God, Professor Thompson
I'm a fool, I have to tell you
That I might have left my research
On the subway somewhere

So I'm hoping you'll just give me my degree without my thesis
Love, smiley face