Tom Rosenthal
I’m Out of Town
I had four brothers, future kings every man
Aethelbald, Aethelred, Aethelbert, and Aethelstan
I'm not an Aethel but I'll end up being King
They mostly ended up the wrong end of a Viking
Every time I spoke to Viking Guthrum
To try to broker peace
He always seemed to break his promise
So ceasefire had to cease
His armies entered Exeter
I caused him strife
But he fought back, so now
I'm flighting for my life
I'm out of town, I'm in retreat
Don't wanna end up as Viking meat
I've hurried off, I am upset
Hiding in the marshes of Somerset
I'm on the run though I'm supposed to be top man
Think I'm beat, but this is neat
It's my royal master plan
I know this land so well, I'll catch him hit-and-run
Mount attacks on Viking shacks - it's like I've won
On the isle of Athelney is where
Great legends all began
People say that while I was there
I burnt cakes in a pan
They say there was nothing left
But smouldering cakey goo
Is this story real?
I must admit it's not true
I'm out of town, but now I see
A way to win, build a huge army
I'm hanging in, I'm getting tough
Quite soon those Vikings will have had enough
Now with my army, Guthrum's men, I'm whippin' 'em
They exit Exeter, now chipper in Chippenham
Prove to the country I've got what it takes
But all people ask, though: Is it true about the cakes?
I win the fight, I am the King
Tough like my brothers, killed the Viking
I'm number one, I am the boss
You mess with me and that'll be your loss
I won the war, came out on top
Viking roaming needs to stop
I raised the stakes, I got the breaks
But I didn't really burn the cakes