Heidi Blickenstaff
I Got This
[KATHERINE]
(spoken)
Mom, your life, is a cakewalk!

(sung)
I got this
I got this
I can see what to do for me to be you
I got this
I'll bake stuff
I can fake like I make stuff like you
I'll have a laugh
Have my coffee half-caff
And then yell at the staff
On your behalf
I got this
Yeah, I got this
Put a stick up my butt, be quick to say
"What? That, not this"
I'm perfection
I don't need your direction at all
Call me a slob
Or a slackerish blob
I can act like a snob
And fool that mob
I got this
Like it's my job
[ELLIE]
(spoken)
Good. You can see what it means to have a job. I'll go to school

(sung)
I got this
Yeah, I got this
Do my hair with some care
I'll primp and prepare
I got this
I'm delighted

[KATHERINE]
It's not right you're excited for school

[ELLIE]
Scoff if you may
It's a part I can play
And it's only a say
And so I say

I got this
Yes, I got this
I'll be bright and demure
Act right 'til I'm sure
They've bought this
I'll show you
No, nobody will know it's not you
Leave it to me
'Cause how hard can this be
And such esprit
I got this
Soon you'll see

[ELLIE enters Grover Cleveland High School. It looks nice.]

[ELLIE]
I think I'm looking forward
To my day, to tell the truth
A day amid the energy
And innocence of youth
A thousand fellow students
All excited just like me
A community of learners
Really, how hard could it be?
How hard could it be?

[The hallway erupts with STUDENTS and TEACHERS in their usual morning frenzy.]

[STUDENTS]
I got this (I got this)
I got this (I got this)
I got this (I got... this)
I got this (I...)
I got this!
[ELLIE, spoken]
Good morning. Good morning

[WELLS, spoken]
Hey, here comes the Listmaster!

[ADAM emerges from the crowd, a paragon of adorable cool.]

[STUDENTS]
Adam! Ahhh

[ADAM]
Now listen up, you hunters
Here's the rules and here's the deal
The list goes up online at nine
And then the hunt's for real

Don't schmooze for clues
'Cause I'll refuse
I only do what's right
'Cause I'm Listmaster Adam
And my word is law tonight

[STUDENTS]
His word is law tonight

[ADAM, STUDENTS]
(Yeah) Tonight's the night

[STUDENTS]
Woo!
We got this (We got this)
We got this (We got this)
And we're ready to roll
Not quite in control
We got this
Listmaster
Please talk faster
At last the hunt is here

[GRETCHEN]
Give us the news

[PARKER]
And a clue to the clues

[HANNAH]
'Cause I'll due if I lose

[STUDENTS]
I swear I will

[ADAM]
I got this
All must chill

[ELLIE, spoken]
Hannah. I don't "like" him. Do I?

[HANNAH, spoken]
No
You loooooove him

[GRETCHEN, spoken]
Oh, god, it's Savannah

[SAVANNAH]
I got this
I got this
I'm the queen of the hunt
You're green, you're a grunt
I got this
You'll lose girl
If you choose to refuse
Girl, to see
You shouldn't begin
With a war you can't win
'Cause I'm smarter than sin
I'm rich and I'm thin
Savannah

[SAVANNAH acquires some backup singers from among the STUDENTS]

[STUDENTS]
Look out, it's Savannah

[SAVANNAH]
Vox Humana

[STUDENTS]
She's our Vox Humana

[SAVANNAH]
Is the cock of the walk
I'm talkin' the top banana

[STUDENTS]
She's the top banana

[SAVANNAH]
So trust me

[STUDENTS]
Uh-oh

[SAVANNAH]
Watch the hunt end
With just me on top

[STUDENTS]
Top!

[SAVANNAH]
I never fail
No, I always prevail
Ask Harvard and Yale

[SAVANNAH, STUDENTS]
So weep and wail

[SAVANNA]
I got this

[STUDENTS]
She's got this

[SAVANNAH]
Kiss my tail!

[SAVANNAH sucker punches ELLIE and exits. The bell rings. STUDENTS run to class.]

[ELLIE]
I got this
I got this

[DR. EHRIN, the school counselor, enters. He looks at ELLIE, taps his watch.]

[DR. EHRIN]
Ellie Blake. Where are you supposed to be right now?

[ELLIE]
I don't know