Heidi Blickenstaff
Not Myself Today
[KATHERINE]
I was ready to be grown-up
Just waiting for the day
And now I am, I'm freaking
Does mommy feel this way?
See, they think that I have answers
They look to me to guide
They see this old, old woman
But there's a little girl inside

I'm not myself today
I'm in a funny way
I'm not the thing
They think they see
This alpha mommy
She's not me
They want a woman I can't be
And words that I can't say
I'm not the woman I thought I was
I'm not myself today

[ELLIE]
I had no idea a woman
Could feel so damn dismissed
They smile and call me sweetheart
Does Ellie feel like this?
See, if only they would listen
I could get the search on track
But when they hear me talking
They just think I'm talking back
I'm not myself tonight
And more than me's not right
Cause Fletcher's lost and so am I
It's not that often, by the by
I wish I were a six-foot guy
But I want to win this fight
I'm not the woman I need to be
I'm not myself tonight

[TORREY]
If I had a kid and the kid ran away
I'd hunt him down and kill him
My god, what a thing to say!
If I had a kid and the kid ran away
I would find him, I would hold him
And then I'd kill him
Okay?
I'm sorry
I'm not myself today

[KATHERINE]
Hey
Are you okay?

[ELLIE]
Are you okay?
[KATHERINE]
I'm not okay...

[ELLIE]
What a day

[KATHERINE]
Even with all of this messed up between us
I thought I would do better...

[ELLIE]
I thought I'd know the way...

[KATHERINE]
I mean, even as you I'm a mess of a person
Can't get my crap together...

[ELLIE]
I'm also a mess I'd say

[KATHERINE]
I'm not myself today...

[ELLIE]
I'm not myself today...
[KATHERINE]
I'm not myself today...

[ELLIE]
I'm not myself...

[KATHERINE, ELLIE]
I'm not myself today

[KATHERINE, ELLIE, MIKE, ENSEMBLE, TORREY]
I'm not myself today Fletcher! If I had a kid and
(I'm) in an awful way Hey Fletch! The kid ran away
I'd hunt him down
And kill him
(I know I should be) Ahh If it were my kid
Standing tall I would put of posters
And adverties in taxis
I've never felt so Hey
Young and small Hey Fletcher If it were my kid
It breaks my heart to
Hear them call Fletcher... I'd freak my shiz
When there's nothing
I can say Hey... To hear them say
Hey Fletcher

[ELLIE]
I'm not the woman I thought I was

[ENSEMBLE]
Hey...

[KATHERINE]
I'm not the woman I wished I'd be

[ENSEMBLE]
Hey...

[ELLIE, KATHERINE]
I'm not myself today

[ENSEMBLE]
Hey...Hey...Hey...

[ELLIE, KATHERINE]
I'm not myself today!

[ALL]
Fletcher!
Fletcher!
Fletcher!
Hey...