Bob's at work
Kathy's at school
I'm home alone
Stare at the pool

Eyes start to glaze
I'm off caffeine
To beat malaise
I think I'll clean

Dust the pictures in the hall
Get up close, inspect the faces
That doesn't look at me at all
Oh my goodness, Kathy's braces!

I remember taking this in '92
I'm all aglow because
Bob is giving me a kiss
That's how I know how long ago it was

Leave the pictures in the hall
Erase the stains, head to the foyer
Ignore the black marks on the wall
Caused by my daughter "The Destroyer"

All those things that child broke
Those precious moments that we had
I know she did it to provoke
'Cause she's exactly like her dad
I take a breath, I suffocate
My house dress hurts, my hands go pink
I try to breathe, I feel the weight
Head for the kitchen, for the sink

The cabinet underneath
I grab the bottle, fingers shake
To pop the top I use my teeth
My heart goes fast, I pulse, I quake

I pour the liquid in the bucket
I breathe it in, I taste it, suck it
In my lungs it feels like "whoa"
In my lungs it starts real slow

And then grow, grow
Grow, grow, grow, grow
Oh, oh, ammonia how you take the stain away
Ammonia how you take the pain away

Oh, ammonia
Oh, oh, suddenly I'm laughing and I'm flying
Nothing's wrong and I'm no longer crying
Oh, ammonia
Oh, oh, woo!
Oh, oh, oh, get a little comfortable now
Off comes the dress, unhook the bra
Rip the curtain off the window, yeah
That mailman likes what he just saw

Breathe in, I breathe in, I breathe in
Don't have a kid, Don't have a spouse
Breathe in, I breathe in, I breathe in
Aww shit, I love to clean the house!

Rip the pictures off the wall
The plastic smiles, the hidden tears
Soon as each one starts to fall, the memory in it disappears
And I travel back in time
To happy days, to 17
Before I chose which hill to climb
Back when the slate was clean, clean, clean

I breathe it in, my feeling falls
I squeeze the sponge, my hand gets wetter
It’s almost like the liquid knows that it’s making me feel better
I love it more than I love Bob
If I could marry it I would
It drives me wild, it does the job
Does what that asshole never could
Aw baby, make me feel so good!
Oh, oh, ammonia how you take the stain away
Ammonia how you take the pain away

Oh, ammonia
Oh, oh, suddenly I'm gasping and convulsing
I scream, I squeal, I feel my body pulsing
Oh, ammonia

My daughter used to love me
She doesn't anymore
I wish that she could see me right now
Naked on the floor

I'd make her look me in the eyes
I'd give her this advice

Every time you make a compromise
It comes at quite a price
It sneaks up on you in the dark
And it always leaves a mark

And oh, no, ammonia cannot take that stain away
It doesn't truly take the pain away
Oh, ammonia
Oh, oh, it isn't really genuine elation

Just temporary, sweet alleviation
Oh, ammonia
Oh, oh, breathe it in hard as I can muster
And suddenly I start to see the luster

Oh, ammonia
Oh, oh, there it is, I'm screaming and I'm flying
Nothing's wrong and I'm no longer dying
Oh, ammonia

Oh, oh, la la-la la-la la-la la-la la
La la-la la-la la-la la-la la
Oh, ammonia

Bob just got home
Kathy too
My day was fine
And how are you?

Put back the bottle
But I feel no sorrow
'Cause oh, ammonia
I'll see you tomorrow

Oh, ammonia